april things

crossed legs on the train

as if you can somehow make yourself disappear

the more tightly they are crossed

imagining bones beyond flesh

knowing this is what is making us do moving

all I can think is I’m going to Brussels, I’m going, I am

the words in my ear

yes it’s you, you are never on time

other children were taught to breathe

I am unaware of the right technique cause my mother never taught me, we were too busy crying by the front door – never taught to be comfortable in front of a man, only to want him to take care of me, put me in hotels and pay for my silks (code for pills) in irritable tiredness I will kill those who chew gum (I need you silence) give me seven sweet hours on a bus and a namesake city please (the thought that everything is terrible brings a smile to my face) (will I have to wait ages to die of embarrassment) I have decided that here I will smoke cigarettes and develop a taste for aniseed while my dreams fill with snakes, nightly slitherings. I think I will cut the rest of everything in half, if you think you can repair it