soml

trying to sort my life out whilst feeling so very far away, seems like i am doing life admin for another person, do yr own bloody life admin

today i watched a documentary about poultry farming and i cried

i feel like i can't do anything and i don't have to (kind of)

i always think a lot of things but then i will think oh well nothing means anything so that's okay

the other night i saw guy williams do comedy and i thought it was good and he said something about 'hologram vogels' and it made me laugh even though i can't remember the context

also sam taught me a cool game called 'touchface' where you touch someone's face (whole hand from top to bottom on their face) and say 'touchface' and they do it back to you and we had fun playing that and i taught it to my flat mates and it is good and you should do it unless you don't want to and think it's dumb

lately when i see couples i feel something akin to pity, i told my friend this at burger fuel whilst drinking a honey cola, she agreed, they were a playing a dubstep remix of bootylicious by destinys child

i feel good being single, i feel like, i am me and i am just doing things i want and being with people i want and idgaf

i often think i will never be able to be with any one person for a very long period of time, like it seems insane that people do that but i understand why they do

at the same time, i like being in love, my flat mate is in love and we talk about how when you are in love you don't care about pda, that's probably my favourite thing, the way the merging of bodies feels intuitive, like walking into a pleasant, cool ocean, on sunday she was sitting outside with her lover and i was doing the dishes and i thought something like 'if i was in love i wouldn't have to do the dishes'

i want to be with people who are far away always