Saturday, December 15, 2012

remembering when i could open my window from my bed, reach outside and return with handfuls of jasmine
feel like i am much too nostalgic for my own good
thinking about the last times i cried
i cried a little last night out of exhaustion and illness
i cried when i was drunk and my coat and iphone got stolen
people hugged me in the smoking area of ‘da club’
one of the times i vividly remember crying is sitting in an empty room in a flat in wellington
we were both crying with our faces close together and we were not afraid to cry because there were worse things to be afraid of
like not being together
feel unable to express certain things, uh, even feel unable to identify what i can’t express
seems like everyone likes coke or coke zero or diet coke except me
i hate it when people smoke and the smoke hits my face but if you did that i would say i don’t care and maybe i don’t when you do it
in the night i woke up from a fever and felt v worried about nazis, feel delirious 
tonight for dinner i ate steamed broccoli and courgette, and for dessert i will eat 1x reeses peanut butter cup
people want to know what other people eat right, that’s interesting right
i’m not saying i want all of it, all of the time
because there is nothing that i want that bad
but if we’re talking statistics
you can have 99.99% of me
i mean i will try anyway

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